obsession

i donno wat to sae
if i break up because of religion.
why?????
ahhhhh headache.

wah i very angry.
i feel some teachers look down on me.
please hor.
even though im young im not a terrible teacher.
i'm nice to my students doesn't mean they have no discipline.

please hor.
i was considered for MODERATION for DISTINCTION
during my practicum.
if i didnt end up in the hospital
i would probably get a DISTINCTION.
how many ppl in NIE can sae that they get a DISTINCTION
for Practicum.

blah.
please hor.
if im a lousy teacher i will not get honours for my
EDUCATION DEGREE.
i will not get the EDB award, SIBIOL award,
Singapore Since Award.
PLEASE HOR!!!!!!!

im so mad and angry.
doesn't mean im young im super inexperienced.
the fact that i am the youngest teacher in the school
means that i am a very capable person
and i am a person who can achieve
MUCH MORE WHEN I REACH YOUR BLARDEEE AGE.

so please do not doubt my teaching abilities.
i use cLS in my class EVERYWEEK.
I use higher order thinking in my class everyweek.
i make my students write out the whole sentence as corrections to learn from their mistakes.

furthermore,
i am not only competent in my pedegogy strategies,
i am competent in IT
and i am also very competent in music.
i am in fact the only teacher who has a DIPLOMA in piano performance
in the school
and learning jazz piano.

so PLEASE
do not DOUBT MY ABILITIES
and do not think that i am an UNCAPABLE TEACHER
with experience
I AM SURE
I AM SUPER SURE
i can be better than you.
IN FACT I WILL MAKE SURE I WILL BE BETTER THAN U
AND MAKE U SUFFER UNDER ME.
THANK YOU.

why am i so tired?
bla.... i keep on wanting to sleep?
anyway, how's resolution so far???
well, i did take up jazz piano
AND I ABSOLUTELY LOVE IT
just two songs and i cant stop playing
my fingers became numb
i can't wait for the next lesson.
i feel so happy playing it.
not like classical
i get very angry with my fingers
cause must be precise.
jazz is like
even if ur not precise its ok.
just be natural and feel the music.
classical is fun but its serious work.
really need alot of focus and alot of serious work.
every slur, staccato, phrase, dynamics must be in place.
haha. ok. no one understands what im talking about.

anyway, i got scolded from jerico for dating other guys.
im not dating lor. just meeting.
not like i have feelings for the other guy.
anyway the other guy is boring.
no chemistry.
i like, like jerico.
so fun.
but jerico so naggy. haha. maybe all bfs are naggy. haha

anyway cant wait for my march holidays
im so tired of working.
friday my body cannot take it.
i can really feel like im so tired.
maybe dats why i got sick.
blah. at least don go hospital.
i might be broke.

haha no wonder teachers need holidays
really damm tiring la
teach non-stop.
really i wonder how teachers who teach for more than 20 years do it
in the classroom u got to be the autoratarian,
deal with parents need to be patient
need to be a councellor
an administrator,
a planner
WAH SO MANY
really need to multi-task
blah.

hope my observation this fri will improve
stupid kids
damm stupid
donno how to behave during observation.